Welcome to Closeness Sex Coaching
This is not your average therapy session
LET’S GET CLOSER
When people start looking for a sex coach, a lot of questions arise: Will this person get me? Is it safe? Will they be the right fit for us? Can we talk about more than just sex? Oh my gosh, our coach is a man!
With over a decade of positive experience, the answer is yes! I can likely help… profoundly. In most cases, if you’re struggling with nearly anything related to sex, intimacy, communication, confidence, assertiveness, seduction or relationships, you’re in the right place.
I guide, teach, counsel, educate, facilitate and mediate. I help remove barriers to intimacy with your partner and even within yourself. We can navigate those hard conversations and explore what it means to feel desired and to desire your partner in a safe space.
THINGS ARE A LITTLE DIFFERENT HERE
What you can expect from your intimacy session:
Choose between life coaching or sex and intimacy coaching session
When you arrive at the office, all you have to do is sit down and talk to me. Nothing else is required of you. Traditional. Easy. Effective.
Alternatively, I also teach through the power of example, safe interactive exercises, demos, and even sometimes couple’s games.
I teach you how to make your female partner feel desired, wanted and pursued. Here is just a taste of what you can. expect to learn: how to approach and seduce her, create hot chemistry on the spot or restore it, figure out what turns her on and how to pleasure her, initiate and have build sexual tension WITHOUT having sex. In your session we figure out what you both want and then I teach you how to get it.
WHAT WOMEN WANT
With consent and when requested, I teach couples how to be more assertive, confident and natural with their partner in a way that women find sexually arousing and thrilling.
Every man wants to give his female partner a hot and fun experience, but almost no woman wants to teach her man how to do this or tell him what she needs.
I also help women tap into their own pleasure and help them figure out what they want.
Of course none of this can be done without first working through our sticking points. We build emotional trust first by cleaning up old resentments and healing the places that are wounded. Sometimes that happens in the course of a few minutes and other times it may take a session or two. But you will never be expected to “jump right in to the sex stuff.” Unless that is specifically what you’re looking for.
The right kind of atmosphere in the office:
SOOTHING
The office boasts a 180 degree, rainforest style view of nature with stunning floor to ceiling glass windows. Enjoy sprawling views, soothing art, soft furniture, mood lighting, oversized down pillows… it’s the real deal.
SENSUAL
Everything is soft the way a sex coaching office should be. Great atmosphere, huge floor length mirrors, a tantra chair, and your own private exit when you can’t wait to go home and explore what you’ve learned! Closeness is a full sensory experience for those who wish to explore.
SANITARY
I am an immaculate person and love a clean space. There are also two HEPA air filtration systems for great air flow. There’s enough room to stretch out or put your feet up, air conditioning and heating and clean restrooms. Bottled Voss water and Pellegrino or sparkling pineapple juice available upon request.
RATES
WORLD CLASS SEX COACHING AND INTIMACY COACHING
Terms, Conditions and Incentives:
DEPOSIT
A 1-hour $250 deposit is required to secure your first daytime sex coaching appointment or $300 after 5pm and on weekends.
This deposit applies directly to the first hour of your visit. Simply send a Venmo or ApplePay after you book with me or on Calendly.
You can reschedule or cancel your appointment anytime up to 36 hours in advance to keep your deposit.
All missed, cancelled or rescheduled appointments within the 36 hour window prior to your appointment will forfeit the deposit, as it is difficult to rebook with such short notice.
Once you have attended your first visit, you do not need to prepay for future visits.
PACKAGES
If you purchase 5 hours of time with me, you can take $150 off the top when paid in advance or on your first session.
That’s $1100 (Instead of 1250) for 5 hours or $1350 (instead of $1500) for after hours and weekend sessions.
Use the time how you wish: Individual one hour sessions. 2 ninety minute sessions + 2 one hour, or 2 two and half hour sessions.
All purchased time must be used within 2 months.
THE 2-hour window
You are not obligated to do a two hour intimacy coaching session.
Most couples and singles find it nice to not be kicked out of the office after 50 minutes. I leave a two-hour window open for us to get results and you only pay for the time that we use. Payments are finalized after the session, and remember you already paid the deposit.
Some couples do 3 or even 4 hours sessions. If I have the time, and we’re really getting traction, we can keep going so you don’t feel rushed.
BILLING
Billing is in 15 minute increments, not by the minute.
Generally sessions run 60, 90 or 120 minutes
If you are limited on time due to financial reasons or you have to leave, please advise me at the beginning of our intimacy coaching session
Accepted Payment methods: Cash, Venmo, Apple Pay, Bitcoin, Zelle, CashApp and all major credit cards.
Yes you can pay with Bitcoin at the rate of $300 per hour
Credit Cards carry a 5% surcharge. Missed or canceled appointments carry a one hour fee.
WHAT TO EXPECT FROM A CLOSENESS SESSION
I SHOW YOU HOW IT’S DONE, BUT FIRST YOU HAVE TO FEEL SAFE
Every session always begins with talking and getting acquainted, to get comfortable and build trust.
We figure out why you’re here, what you’d like to get out of your session etc. In many cases, we may talk the entire session.
If what you are looking for as a couple is to build more intimacy, you will also have the option to interact with each other in real time with my guidance. This usually starts with eye contact, or basic clean interactions.
We can escalate things at a glacial speed stopping any time, or quickly based on your comfort level. From here, you’ll actually witness your chemistry begin to build.
Experiential change in how you interact around your partner happens at an order of magnitude greater than traditional talk only methods.
By engaging and interacting with each other in a safe, fun and consensually suggestive way, desire increases, emotional trust gets repaired and sexual attraction builds right before your eyes. Usually women are much more comfortable with this part.
You’ll get respectful, kind, real-time feedback and coaching on what excites you, shuts you down, opens you up or turns you on without the need to get undressed. All interactions are optional, consent based and effective.
Remember: Talk only sessions with zero interactions are always ok.
RESULTS HAPPEN QUICKLY, BUT WE STILL MOVE AT YOUR COMFORT LEVEL
Like listening to my podcast, it does’t take long to see results or identify what needs to change. You will leave your first session with a LOT of new insights as well as multiple ways to confidently initiate with your partner or future partner.
You can apply everything I teach in session or as soon as you walk out the door.
If something isn’t clear, we can, with everyone’s consent, show you how to get the result you’re looking for by modeling it or demonstrating it in a way that works for you.
I am your personal advocate. I take a warm, direct and sensual approach to intimacy and do not take sides, regardless of who contacted me first.
THIS IS A CLASSY AND ELEGANT SPACE
Let’s face it, we’re talking about some pretty hot and intimate stuff here. Sometimes unexpected emotions and anxieties around sex and intimacy do come up.
It is absolutely ok for things to get spicy and exciting in your session. It is also perfectly fine if they do not. It´s ok to feel excitement. This is, after all the point of why you came to see me. If you find yourself a little aroused, or even turned on, or if it feels like your sexual chemistry is building and being restored, that means you’re doing it right!
There are no fluids exchanged. No one needs to get undressed. Nothing messy occurs.
Closeness coaching needs to be experienced:
Tari is THE BEST! I had been researching premarital counseling and intimacy coaching when I discovered Tari’s Closeness podcast. I was immediately hooked and thrilled to find out he offered in-person coaching. From the first communication Tari was welcoming, proactive in accommodating. My husband and I both look forward to our sessions, whether its a couples sessions or one on one. Tari has a superpower in translating my thoughts into a language my husband can understand. He has been able to dissect so many issues, anxieties and behaviors and then transform them with his exercises and expertise. We have been able to work through heavy issues (and comical issues) but always leave his office feeling happy and closer than ever!
Working with Tari has been the best investment in our marriage and myself!
Abi Gault, San Diego
ABOUT THE OPTIONAL INTERACTIONS AND DEMOS:
Show me how you make her feel...
I hold space for unique interactions and demos that create trust, excitement and arousal. The way you hold and carry yourself in intimate situations matters, even if you're just walking across the room to her. Understanding the effects your body language and eye contact has on your partner, is key for a great connection.
Sometimes we have to un-layer some bad habits first. This includes talking too much, being overly careful when you touch her and dismantling the belief that you need to act or role play or can't be yourself.
We can transform your tone, energy, body language, and approach so that your partner actually responds favorably- i.e. sexually- to you and finds you more attractive. She needs to feel like you're present, unwavering, masculine and that you desire her to feel SAFE before she will open up.
Next, you'll genuinely connect with your partner
Couples often think that foreplay or warming her up takes hours, but it can be done in minutes and even seconds. It's all about the sexual tension and making a connection. Not with your brain but with your energy. How to use your masculine energy and your eyes. You cannot logic your way through it or "deal with her" the way you would in a business setting. Sex is not a one trick situation.
You open her with presence and connection. How's your breathing? Your presence and comfort in yourself? I'll teach you about the domain of the erotic and how to fan the flames of desire. In English, that means I'll teach you how to get her wet from your energy and ready for sexual intimacy.
Eroticism can't flourish in the suffocating space of control, mechanical movement, silliness, too much comfort or overbearing dominance.
Finally, you can explore with connected touch
Does she like the slow burn and build up, or does she get antsy when you're too slow because she needs more passion and intensity? Being able to read this is huge for all couples. What if she wants something different day to day?
Most women want to start slow then ramp up to the perfect intensity. Other women are calibrated to crave more immediate erotic and overtly sexual advances, while others like to be constantly teased. In a sex coaching session we figure out your woman's sexual strategy and give her what works!
Step by step, I teach you how to dial it back, or ramp it up in REAL time, so you can visibly see her arousal - or rejection. We do it again and again using her arousal as an indicator of whether it's working or not.
I teach HEALTHY assertiveness, confidence, leadership, and competence training.
This level of attentiveness and intimacy coaching is unavailable anywhere else!
Click the heading above to get a taste
Follow through and moving forward
When your partner feels aroused by you simply by being in your presence, no words are required. You have built powerful chemistry. She responds by getting excited and actually wanting to have sex with you. There is no need for convincing, begging or asking.
You simply cannot learn things like this in a therapist's or sex therapists office. It's off the table. But now that you've done and seen it in real time, you can take what you've learned and put it to use at home by having a great evening together. Yes, chemistry can be learned, it can be restored and you can make your woman see you differently or the way she used to. And yes, I can teach you how to harness all of that.
Contrary to what many believe, chemistry and sexual tension can be created out of thin air. It happens all the time.
I AM YOUR SEXUAL TRANSLATOR
It doesn't take much to get your partner excited
Did you know women can shift from being frustrated and emotional to being incredibly turned on in minutes or seconds?
As your sex coach, I have a rare ability to put into words and action, that which your partner simply cannot. I can teach you how to speak to and interact with your woman in a way that lights her up and makes her want to want you.
I TEACH CONFIDENCE, PRESENCE, ASSERTIVENESS, COMPETENCE AND HEALTHY DOMINANCE.
LEARN TO ENGAGE WITH HER EFFECTIVELY AND SEXUALLY IN A WAY THAT SHE LOVES.
However, you do not need to come see me for purely sexually related reasons. Many couples want to learn to communicate better. I can say the words you struggle to say, help each other gain perspective and navigate topics that are too hot to tackle on your own. I facilitate hard discussions without escalating anxiety. It’s also great to have someone to talk to who is outside of your friend group and can give you a professional opinion.
WHEN YOUR WORDS GET LOST IN TRANSLATION, I AM YOUR TRANSLATOR
HAVE BETTER SEX TONIGHT
YOU'VE NEVER EXPERIENCED SOMETHING LIKE THIS BEFORE
Often, current clients who have gone through traditional forms of therapy, sex therapy, psychotherapy and marriage and family counseling, report that the advice they received was too general or bland.
Sexual intimacy requires more nuance and awareness around very specific interactions. Therapists are a wonderful and necessary asset for our mental and emotional health, but when you’re looking for help with polarity, masculine and feminine energy, assertiveness, intensity, chemistry, passion, connection and excitement, you need something different.
Here, you can share your intimate, sexual thoughts, needs, desires and truths that no one else knows, without fear of judgement and without it leaving the room.
It’s incredible what getting it out getting to your truth can do for you.
In session, I read the room, use language and body language that you’re comfortable with and guide you and your partner in a respectful, suggestive way that allows transformation to happen immediately.
FOR WOMEN
INDECISIVENESS
Indecisiveness is often a part of female nature. So is not knowing yourself. So is not knowing what you want, and not wanting to teach your man what you do want. Many women want and expect a man to just know these things or for them or figure it out. Women want their partners to know what to do, how to touch, lead, uncover what excites her and to do so in a confident and attractive way. It’s amazing what calm masculine presence, assertiveness and confidence can do to help you open and receive pleasure.
Women generally cannot and do not want to teach their partner how to have sex with them, seduce them or give them the emotional piece that’s missing from so many relationships today. This is where I come in.
It’s difficult if not impossible for women to communicate to their partner how to become a better or more dominant and sensual lover. Yet, women crave romance, passion, hot and intense experiences, enormous amounts of attention, healthy dominance and a healthy dose of masculinity. Sometimes in session women will say right to their partners face- hey you’re smiling again! Your’e being too soft or playful! You’re not taking this seriously!
If you relate, or if you’re unsure of what to do next in the intimacy department, we can do some fantastic work together. With regard to sensual or sexual interactions, I am equipped to handle all traditional and non-traditional relationships as well as all level of desire and intensity.
WHAT DOES THIS CLOSENESS GUY KNOW ANYWAY?
Sometimes a girl has just got to come in and get some things off her chest! Sometimes girlfriends and therapists are not always the right answer.
Let’s state the obvious: I am a man, helping and teaching women how to get in touch with that very special part of themselves. I help you get to know yourself, get out of your head and out of your own way to help you get what you want and need sexually.
I encourage you to read through some of the countless loving reviews on Google, Yelp, and here on the Closeness website if you’re skeptical. It’s not easy to share our intimate stories like this publicly, so the fact that these women have, speaks volumes.
It’s always surprising to me that in almost every couple’s session, it’s the women who want more. More from their partner, more play, intensity, arousal, excitement. Interestingly, it’s the women who are ready to go further, have more done to them and who can handle more. This is beautiful to see but definitely demystifies the stereotype that men are more sexual.
It’s true that sometimes you may be dealing with an emotional block, or feel stuck in your head. Yes it is up to you to get to know yourself too, but I have also found that it is often something the male or masculine partner is not doing, or is doing incorrectly that prevents great sex or intimacy.
From me to you, even though you’re coming to see the ‘sex coach,’ please know that I know, there is so much more to life than sex and or penetration. Your sessions don’t need to focus on sex or intimacy at all. I’m an extremely capable life coach. You can come in to process, work through your thoughts, express your desires, or simply get some things off your chest. You have to feel safe, comfortable AND excited to be ready for great sex and I specialize in helping you get there.
Finally, sometimes women carry wounding or pain that makes sexual play or opening up feel difficult. Sometimes, your body may shut down or you might stuck in your head even if you’re craving sex or closeness. I can teach you to be with your yourself in a way that gets your needs met and doesn’t feel compromising. Finally, I can teach your man how to go slow, be patient, and be softer in his approach., if you have a partner. My intimacy guidance helps us work through these issues gently and get great results.
As with all sessions, sitting across from me and simply talking is always, always a great option!
SUPPORT THROUGH BETRAYAL AND CHEATING
Do you stay or do you go?
Have you discovered some intimate texts or communication from someone outside of your relationship?
Or is it an affair that has been going on for years and the lying has devastated you to your core?
Before we can begin to restore what has been damaged, we need to discover what’s true. Do you actually want to stay in this and work through it? Are you open to restoring trust with your partner? Can they do the work?
These answers may seem obvious, but they aren’t so easy to answer. Not when love, family, status, lifestyle and children are involved. I will personally help you discover what is real and true so that you can make choices that serve your relationship or I can help separate you in a safe and respectful way. Though I do always aim for Closeness, I can facilitate a respectful decision to separate or consciously uncouple.
OPEN RELATIONSHIPS, ONLY FANS AND SEX WORK
SUPPORT THROUGH TRADITIONAL AND NON TRADITIONAL ARRANGEMENTS
If you’ve been involved or are currently involved in the sex work industry, Only Fans, or if you’re a porn star, I have the experience to help you navigate your intimate and romantic life outside of your work. It may seem odd at first to work with a sex coach, when your word revolves around sex, but relationships need to be handled a little differently in this world.
For many in the sex work industry, monogamy doesn’t just feel off, it may be impossible to maintain. I can help you create healthy boundaries and agreements for your relationship while still having all the hot sex that you crave with your partner.
Does sex work leave you feeling shut down and turned off to real intimacy? Maybe your choice of partner has been less than ideal and you want to learn how to choose better or love your body more. Have you noticed it’s harder to connect with someone in the real world? Often clients come in because they want to make sure they’re not broken, or be reminded what it feels like to be seen, appreciated and adored.
I can help you get in touch with that piece that feels like it’s missing.
Women are very receptive to love, sex and intimacy when you treat them the right way.
BECOMING THE MAN YOU WERE BORN TO BE
As men we rarely have a safe space to get real help. How do you learn how to actually take care of your woman, get both of your needs met and keep her turned on and excited for you? We want things to last forever but they rarely do. The world often doesn’t understand or have time for a man’s emotional pain.
As men we are expected to take rejection regularly, not break down and just know how to do things. Know how to please her, seduce her, read her and love her. Know when to move forward, assertively but not when she’s not feeling it.
But what if you, like most of us, never got the memo? It’s not even on our radar or we never learned how to do any of this? Where do you go for help?
Closeness offers the necessary guidance to get her turned on by YOU and YOUR touch, in real time, so that you can be more effective and powerful in the bedroom.
THE SKILLS YOU WISH YOU LEARNED GROWING UP
When you bring your partner in, the magic really happens.
You will go home with a new skill set.
One that will allow you to be more sensual, sexual and emotionally available on the first night after your appointment.
Due to the nature of how sexual attraction works, I request that men are present with their female partner present at first so that we can all be on the same page and get better results.
How will you know what we are doing is working? Because you will see it written all over her face and body.
Great sex, lasting longer, presence, assertiveness, passion, intimacy and communication. These are a learned set of skills.
It doesn’t have to be as daunting as you’ve made it out to be in your head. Everyone needs a little help. If you are the kind of man who can put his ego to the side, I’ve got a great tool box that will blow your mind, and hers. If you can be open to learning a new skill, and be willing to put in the work, you will have a partner who respects you more and wants to follow your lead.
SOMETHING DIFFERENT
No matter how innocent or docile a woman may appear, nearly a decade in practice has shown me that most women are still curious and excited about some pretty hot activities, and those who aren’t would often like to be!
Who do you talk about this with? How do you explore it mildly before before going all out? Thinking about some light BDSM? A threesome, a sex party, using a new toy? Keep reading.
It’s hard to think of one place where a woman can go to safely get to know or understand her erotic side without having to perform. Without feeling expected to give more of herself. More than she’s ready for. More confusion and more pressure.
Where can you talk about, nurture and bring out your erotic side without any pressure or judgement? Maybe for the daring, at certain types of parties or public events, but that can often feel a little too exposed and vulnerable for most. Even the idea of someone wanting more from you when you’re not ready is uncomfortable.
But what if you could have an experiential session that moves at your own pace, where you’re in control… or not if you don’t want to be? A place where you could ask questions, not feel silly, and explore the things that do and don’t get you going?
THe erotic
As a woman, you may feel stuck in your head, with never-ending thoughts. Most women don’t have strategies for this. They don’t have ways to feel more relaxed and allow some sexual excitement and curiosity to circulate through them.
I have found over the years that many women seem to live a double life. They want desperately to get to know themselves sexually, they crave intense experiences and yearn to be taken or taken on an erotic adventure! Often, some even want to be taken, without any conversation. They hope that it will simply happen. They wait for it to happen. But then real life hits them. The same old interactions. The same old sex and usually a partner “asking” to have sex with her.
You are always welcome to bring your in session and they are encouraged to come. I can consensually guide you both to discover what excites you. Working at your comfort level, your partner will clearly see – in no uncertain terms – what turns you on and what turns you off. We’ll learn about verbal and non-verbal communication, eye contact, distancing, approach, pressure, intensity and passion. We’ can also un-layer some of his bad habits and quirks that may get in the way of hot or loving intimacy.
If you don’t have a partner, you can come on your own. We can talk. And maybe build on a series of demos and interactions together that help you understand yourself on a much, much deeper level, leaving you feeling very well cared for.