In this episode, we tackle 13 common barriers that can stand in the way of a thriving sexual connection with your partner. Whether it’s logistical issues, bad timing, or emotional disconnection, these roadblocks can quietly chip away at intimacy. The good news? Every one of these obstacles can be addressed easily, paving the way for better connection, desire, and satisfaction.
It’s Not Just About Desire—It’s About the Setup
Sometimes, logistics are the real problem. Are there too many pillows on the bed creating a barrier to even touch? Is your couch too small or your bed too uncomfortable for sex to happen? Even practical issues like pets sleeping on the bed or family members out staying their welcome can disrupt your ability to connect. It’s easy to create a space that feels inviting, private, and comfortable. A lock on the door, rearranged furniture, or a cozy setup can work wonders.
From Platonic to Passionate
Another common roadblock is behaving too much like a platonic friend. If you’re not making sensual or sexual gestures beyond a quick peck or a hand on her shoulder—it’s hard to shift the energy toward intimacy. Sensual or sexual gestures need to happen on the regular. Women crave and need progressions that build tension and desire, so don’t just stop at a hug. Small, intentional actions, like lingering eye contact, touch, or even flirting, help reignite the spark and move you closer to a meaningful connection. In this episode you’ll learn much more about how to act in a way that really gets her attention.
Timing and Effort: Make It Count
Sex in long-term relationships requires effort—it won’t always feel spontaneous or like it happens on its own. Interestingly, women will constantly criticize a man’s “bad timing” without initiating intimacy themselves or letting him know what good timing actually is. Don’t worry, we’ll talk about that too. Good timing is actually a skill you can develop together.
Steady progress with visible changes
Intimacy is a journey, not a switch you flip that stays on forever. Don’t rush in expecting your partner to feel ready after minimal or no effort. Small progressions—playful teasing, seductive gestures, lingering touch, or shared laughter—lay the groundwork for deeper sexual connection. By addressing these roadblocks and taking thoughtful, intentional steps, you can transform your relationship and bring passion back into the bedroom.
Ready to Come Closer?
Learn how to identify and overcome the barriers standing between you and a more fulfilling sex life. Tune in now, and visit Closeness.com for more insights on intimacy, connection, and desire.
Are you ready to come closer?
CHAPTERS:
0:00 Introduction
3:42 1:Logistics
8:03 The three categories of affection
11:33 Logistical problem 1a: Your furnishings
13:37 Logistical problem 1b: Lovers can’t find the time
14:12 2. Family, extended family and kids
15:58 3. No locks on your doors
18:30 4. The zoo that lives with you
19:57 5. Energy
22:35 Not wanting to. Needing it to feel natural
29:25 7. You’re not there emotionally
32:01 8. She shuts down emotionally, feels defeated and broken
36:04 9. Your timing is off!
43:40 Often women don’t even know what bad timing is
46:05 10. Pressure
50:36 11. Not putting yourself in your partners shoes (empathy and understanding)
54:15 12. Too many broken promises
56:50 13. Not making small progressions towards sex
